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I have been having a round of insomnia as of late, which leads me to stories.
Sometimes you can move clear across the country, and you feel like it might as well have been around the world.The culture. and etiquette is completely different, and most of the time, you are just lost in translation – if you haven’t seen that film, you should, it is brilliant. When Motherhood approached, I knew that everyone would have their own ideas and opinions, and would want to tell you all about them. About two months after giving birth, I was able to walk steadily for about 20 min, and it wasn’t a very fast pace. I would break out into an inferno sweat, then sit on a bench wondering if I was ever going to make it back. At that point, I knew I had to start a stroller fitness class.
In downtown Vancouver, or Yuppy Ville, stroller fitness is done along the sea wall. It is actually kind of cool concept, Since I had gained 30lbs after my near death experience (nothing like dropping 25 after birth, to then gain it back and lose all your muscle mass, to make you feel exceptionally good about yourself :)). I religiously began these classes, I took them at different locations, overall it was a great experience. It was nice just to get out of the house and try to get my body active, although I probably could have fallen asleep standing up.
After one intensive class, I went and sat outside with a bunch of ladies. We all had our coffee, or we were nursing, and just chatting. One Mother declared “does anyone else hate sex” – Oh no, please don’t start on this, was the only thing running in my head.
There was a long silence, I guess she wanted to stop traffic. A few Mother’s gracefully managed to get up and vacate the premise. I was at that moment, in an awkward position of nursing and holding a coffee.
Then a deep breath came and “It feels like I am being split in two” – ok don’t know you, but in my head I was thinking, this isn’t so bad, totally normal to talk about – or is it?
“It seems to only hurt when I have sex with my husband, but when I have sex with my boyfriend, it is fine.” and here the crazy starts. Oh lordy, you just had a baby and you have a boyfriend. What part of crazy did I land on, and where is the exit?
Not much stuns me, but, this one made me backtrack a bit. I was hoping to find a graceful way to get up and walk away, but there were only 3 of us sitting there, and that was including the sex lady.
As the story began to unfold. The Mother said she and her husband had an open relationship. O.K no judgement on that, but I didn’t really ask to know any of this.
She then launched into detail. She was angry that her husband was constantly leaving, and not taking their child with him. So she had to bring her child to her boyfriend’s house. WHAT???? As she was telling us this, the other Mother was looking at me with an expression to only be described as panic and well, embarrassment – we knew we were stuck, neither of us could get up . All I could think was; how does this work? Do you have a bedroom for your child at your boyfriend’s house? How do you introduce everyone? I just don’t get it?
So as I am sitting there thinking I have been in many awkward positions, I did mention that people tend to tell me things after about 5 minutes of meeting me. I remained silent for the entirety of the rant.
Yup, how do you politely get out of that one? There was a few more tidbits, but, I will leave that out for another time!
By the time we managed to get up, I was so embarrassed that I knew any of this info, that I couldn’t look at either of the Mother’s. In that instant I rationalized that going to this class would have to end. I don’t think I ever ventured anywhere near that neighborhood ever again.
What would you have done? Would you have been polite? How much is just too much?